Talk:Warfighters: Display of Courage/@comment-2098737-20130201231235

Alright, you asked me to review it, so I will give you a review. Please don't take offense in any form or way, I'm just critiquing it.

So first off, you start out very great, I tell what's going on. But as it keeps progressing it gets more and more repetitive.

The part that stands out the most is the word "says". Every single line is "Says".

For two examples pulled from the writing (And I bolded the word):

''"The first one who told me about the target was Ace, he said that we could kill that bastard finally after all the things he had done." says Deadly''

''"So, how did it going, McKnight." says Morgan'' And there's more than that everywhere. I also noticed minor grammar issues, which can easily be fixed (punctuation-wise, most of the words are spelled correctly).So again, please don't take offense, you requested me to give you a review, this is just to help you get better. It's hard taking critique, I take classes where I'm critiqued on everything and critique everyone else. I'm used to it :)And if you are still having trouble and still want to progress being an author, I'd look up on Google on how to improve your writing skills, or take a writing, speech, or drama class. It really helps, trust me.Your welcome,:Violatte